A Cool Day with a hint of Despair

A very simple day. Jaylen's first month celebration was held at Chevron where all the people come together and enjoyed a good meal. All of us are so excited about him and he looked so cute. However, despite the celebrations, I could not bring myself to smile for even a second. Deep inside, I feel like I had totally lost faith in a relationship. That kind of feeling is like,"Nothing will last one. Why bother?"

Well, this whole incident had totally changed me drastically. There is totally no confidence in a relationship and I do not see anyway I can put myself in another relationship since nothing is going to work out anyway. Sigh, to make the matter worse, the main topic revolving around the dinner with Bao Guan is also about Relationships and all that. Suddenly, I feel like I am not anywhere.

Ironically, the same feeling was there last year at the same annual gathering. Well, when Zhu Ren ask me, "Where is Han Nee? Why never ask her out?"

Suddenly, it all seemed so familiar. I felt the same feeling as I felt last year as we also supposed to break contact then. Well, this time round it is very different. There would not be anymore reunion between us. Simply because, I had totally lost faith in a relationship....

However, I am fine. Although I still feel very hurt about this whole event, I am still able to push myself forward day by day. Although things ain't as smooth sailing as it would be, at least I am still inching forward day by day packed with enough activities to drain my energy away from me. I guess I should be fine...